It's the penultimate week of the regular season and the Quiçama Conference Title has been wrapped up! Congratulations to EcuKhemrical Matters. It's squeaky bum time in the Middlelands Conference, the perennial titans Hashutites lead the fray and look odds-on to win the division, whilst there is a scrap for 1 spot between 3 teams!
The MiddleLands Division saw huge swings in fortune to leave 5 teams vying for 3 playoff spots. No side is mathematically out of the equation, but things are looking grim for early pace-setters Mega Smashers and LT's Metal Heads. It's all or nothing for both sides.
Meanwhile in the Quiçama Division, much carnage have reduced a lot of talented sides to near-rubble as we saw FOUR deaths to key players: A killer saurus, a clawed Pestigor, a star Storm Vermin and a road-blocking Flesh Golem. Surviving this conference has become an art in itself.
1. EcuKhemrical Matters (↔1)
Won 2-0 vs Loschaotic Rotten Posse
The Khemri came from two players down from the first couple of hits to surmount an irresistably bullish charge to victory over their Nurgle Conference title rivals. The brutal encounter ensures that the Tomb Kings of old secure the top seed in the division as well as win the Quiçama Divisional Conference with 1 game spare.
2. Hashutites (↔2)
Won 1-0 vs LT's Metal Heads
Hashutites smashed the all-time unbeaten QMLS record that stood for over 30 years on their way to being the first team of the season to qualify for the play-offs. The Chaos Dwarf outfit look impregnable on defence, whilst showing nimbleness on the ball, to secure their now infamous 1-0 Grind. Can the Chorfs extend their undefeated record to an incredible 16?
3. Kouillus (▲6)
Won 3-0 vs Mega Smashers
Kouillus produced a scintillating display to further their cause as dark horses for the QMLS Championship. The pair of gutter runners were instrumental in causing the boneheaders a lot head scratching, as they swept away to seal a maiden play-off spot. Top spot may be out of the question, but there is nothing to fear for these furry cretins.
4. Underearth Assassins (▲7)
Won 2-0 vs Dwarverhampton Wanderers
The twisted Naggarothians played their best of this season with a splendid shutout to leap-frog their play-off contenders. On offense, the corp of super-agile elves combined with ease to end the game as a contest midway through the second half.
5. Lochaotic Rotten Posse (▼3)
Lost 0-2 vs EcuKhemrical Matters
The meanest defence in the QMLS were finally breached in extraordinary fashion. The contest eventually swung in midfield to favour the ancient ones, however, there is enough fight in the rotting Nurgle to cause damage for the rest of the campaign. It will take an incredible series of results to eliminate the LRP, but with the death of the clawed Dark Tarallo and 2 other pestigors MNG, they will be undermanned against a desperate Necromantic outfit. The Nurgle are licking festering wounds.
6. Golden Eternals of Chaqua (▲8)
Won 3-0 vs Mersey Scythe
The pre-season favourites got their campaign back on track with a sumptuous 3-0 win against a faltering Necromantic offense. The horde of skinks were the difference as they confidently sniped possession away from the undead. The saurii were statuesque and were frequent bystanders, which made the skinks' performances all the more impressive!
7. Mersey Scythe (▼4)
Lost 0-3 vs Golden Eternals of Chaqua
The Scythe tasted bitter defeat for the first time in their franchise history. It was an emasculated display on offense that set up a frustrating night for the Necro. Super ghoul, Robbie Fowler, was culpable with the ball carrier failing a simple dodge in the first half and failing a simple pass in the second - both resulting in scored turnovers. No doubt his flagrant display will be punished at the crypt.
8. Dwarverhampton Wanderers (▼5)
Lost 0-2 vs Underearth Assassins
The Wanderers will feel disappointed that they couldn't muster the strength to crush some pointy-eared elf. In a game with few injuries, there was little that the short-legged dwarfs could do to stop there opponents dropping 30 yard passes, but it was on offense that the dwarfs will feel that they need to gnash their teeth in fury.
9. The Warpstone-Union (▲12)
Won 2-0 vs Darklands Resurrected
The Warpstone-Union kept their slender hopes of a playoff spot with a well-earned victory in the basement clash against Darklands Resurrected. Fine use of a wizard and a copious supply of claw enabled the motley crew of two-headed gobbos to steal the limelight. Victory does come at a cost, however, and the Resurrected fans - enraged by the on-field antics - threw a rock outright killing a key storm vermin!
10. LT's Metal Heads (▼9)
Lost 0-1 vs Hashutites
Another week of heartache for LT's Men as they were eventually ground down by an impeccable Hashutites outfit. True to form, the humans played their part to ensure that the reigning champions had to earn every inch of their win. This defeat, however, has the Metal Heads in a precarious position and may miss the playoffs! It's all or nothing for the last regular season game!
11. Mega Smashers (▼10)
Lost 0-3 vs Kouillus
Early pace-setters, Mega Smashers, were beaten by a mix of volatile speed and some hardluck that now places great danger to their playoff aspirations. It'll take a humungous effort to overcome reigning champions, Hashutites, and hope results elsewhere go their way.
12. Darklands Resurrected (▼11)
Lost 0-2 vs The Warpstone-Union
From the very first day of Darklands' Blood Bowl career the fans had a blood curdling desire to detroy all that stood foot on the pitch. Friend or foe, it didn't matter. Enraged by the season's poorer than expected showing, the fans hurled a great rock to kill the talented Storm Vermin, Nurgtch. Their reasoning? Kill the most useful player and resurrect them into their ranks. Necromancy is an acquired taste, but these fans keep lapping it up with wanton destruction.
Results:
Mersey Scythe 0
Golden Eternals of Chaqua 3
Mango's Valuable Player: Oatlgorit-tlu lit up the contest with a blistering brace to steal a mightily impressive, and much needed, win for the GEC. The little skink may have just secured a spot in the playoffs for the lizardmen. Dwarverhampton Wanderers 0
Underearth Assassins 2 (Odium Shadowstrike, Hethmair)
Mango's Valuable Player: Celmair's Black Orken strength was fundamental to punching holes through the tough Dwarfen hide. Though no injuries were caused, the overgrown line-elf force fumbled to set the Dark Elves to a fine win.
LT's Metal Heads 0
Hashutites 1 (Ögedei)
Mango's Valuable Player: Harharur the Oppressor was in no laughing mood taking the mantle as key destroyer. The clawed chorf has the makings of rising from his more illustrious brethren and it showed with his telling contribution of 2 injuries and a KO to set up an overwhelming force in defence.
Lochaotic Rotten Posse 0
Ecukhemrical Matters 2 (Nix and TBC)
Mango's Valuable Player: Ptatshut Djahor continued to pile on the misery on all foes with a telling contribution. The Blitz-Ra now leads the league in confirmed kills for the season (2) and total number of injuries (10) - all in a mere 4 games!
Mega Smashers 0
Kouillus 3 (Scalptuk 2, Iklut)
Mango's Valuable Player: Scalptuk the fastest ever QMLS player turned on the afterburners to rush in 2 TDs and in doing so introduced the new Skaven outfit to the playoffs at the first time of asking.
The Warpstone-Union 2 (Kwetch, Nibli)
Darklands Resurrected 0
Mango's Valuable Player: Nurgable Nager is making a name for himself as a one-rat wrecking ball. The super-claw pomber with Warrior strength ritually carved holes for teammate to run through. The demise of his vermin brethren means that he'll shoulder sole-responsibility for killing duties.
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