Metal Heads Snatch Victory In Battle Of The Bands

Ecukhemrical Matters 1

Ptahsut Tabra

LT's Metal Heads 2

Melvins, Mastodon

The Saturday night skirmish saw the brutal battle between play off chasing EcuKhemrical Matters and LTs Metal Heads. A late defensive take away by Mastodon gave the Heads the three points to leap frog their opponents into third on the head-to-head. It would be the famed catcher's last contribution to the cause as he was killed soon after the goal celebrations. Mastodon's murder triggered a last minute brawl that saw THREE players killed including the Heads' game-winning lynchpin.

The time Masterdon was seen alive.

There was huge tension before the game, as the Metal Heads’ prematch ritual was sabotaged, as the Heads metal band who before every game play to psych up the players were kidnapped. EcuKhemrical’s cheerleaders Bony M. made matters worse as they cranked up the amps to 11. The ploy worked, as EcuKhemrical marched up the field with top scorer Ptahsut Tabra running in for a first half lead with the Heads defence helpless in fending off their ancient foes.

The second half was delayed as the Heads prematch entertainment was found tied up and gagged with the bands guitar strings and some distinctively aged papyrus with a huge melee erupting between the two teams back room staff. The Metal Heads finally came out blazing for the second half and, visibly psyched up, the Heads offensive unit equalised with a fine Devin Townsend pass finding Melvins to run in midway through the second half.

Devin Townsend's trademark deep throw set up the equaliser.

With the game evenly poised, EcuKhemrical restarted the game with Tabra collecting the ball. Once again, the offensive unit pound the ground and left little to the imagination. But a slightly eager Tomb Guardian pushed farther ahead of his team and the Heads pounced to drop Tabra, and Mastodon gathered the loose. but marked, ball for the takeaway lead. It was the slenderest chink in the Misr armoury, and the Metal Heads revelled in their blitzing scheme to dislodge the ball

Ecukhemrical were infuriated with themselves and a sudden adjustment on the snap suggested that they marked out the match-winner, Mastodon. A brawl ensued on and off the pitch, as Bony M and the local heavy metal band traded blows, along with the back room staff of both teams until medics from both parties had quickly been summoned as Bal Saggoth and Mastodon of the Heads and Queen of Denial from EcuKhemrical all suffered painful deaths.

Up next. This was EcuKhemricals first defeat since the opening game of the season and need to regroup when they face off against the machine that is Hashutites which already has pundits licking their lips in anticipation, while LTs Metal Heads buoyed by a brilliant second half display and remain the only team in the league to have a 100% success on offence, take on the reigning champion Bognor Bograts in a rematch of last seasons semi final.

A scant but satisfying end to this classic encounter.

Riska's MVP: Mastodon's steal in the second was pure brilliance against a formidable offense, but his untimely death will be a miss for the Heads and the QMLS.