In a shocking revelation hours before the season kicks off in earnest, Dwarverhampton Wanderers have unilaterally taken the decision to terminate their relationship with their head coach, Aldaris, who brought them mixed fortunes in their debut season.
It comes as a surprise to many, due to the close-knit camaraderie, but unbeknownst to the Dwarfs, their head coach is a hardcore pointy-eared fanatic and found their plodding style unsuited to his more expansive approach.
This was clearly a clash of philosophies and the Wanderers were adamant to stand firm on their core principles.
The QMLS Charter for Fair Play, that was implemented post season, saw all existing teams cut their squads to 1 Team Reroll and a maximum team value of 1150k. This provided the Dwarfs ammunition to impulsively act on sacking Aldaris.
Aldaris had the unenviable job of cutting loose two key guards and one of the Dahlberg brothers, which caused pandemonium in the Dwarfen dressing room. The Dwarfs banded together and squeezed out as much information to further their cause, by torturing the coach. Reports state that Aldaris may have uttered the words, “I prefer Elves, you stinking oafs!” under duress.
Paulie Dahlberg, leading star of the team, stood in front of the press to proclaim that Dwarverhampton Wanderers have split ways with Aldaris and that the team will no longer participate in the coming Quiçama MiddleLands Superleague season!
A furore ensued with reporters clamouring for more. The stubborn Dwarfs have declared the organisers of the QMLS enemy of the dwarfen kingdom of Dwarverhampton and have been etched into their Book of Grudges.
It seems their desire to keep the team together was stronger than the will to fight within the new QMLS Charter for Fair Play.
The QMLS organisers soon found themselves in turmoil and scoured for fresh teams across the plains. Their bellowing call was answered by an unlikely source: Aldaris!
The head coach had accepted banishment from his kingdom and embraced refuge amongst the old enemy, the Pro Elves.
“This is for revenge,” Aldaris said. “I have unfinished business in the QMLS and no one, not even a city of grudge-driven soup-dribbling beardos will stop me. I love Elves, and next season we’ll show why!”
We anticipate a completely fresh play style to grace the pitch in Season X, but have we heard the last of the Dwarverhampton Wanderers?
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